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Submitted on
July 26, 2009
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it's the first time i've ever said i just want you to be happy
      and actually meant it. it's something selfish people
   say when they're trying not to be selfish. am i selfish;
sometimes i feel like i am.

tonight held me, the world held me as a tiny speck dancing
   across a parking lot underneath the lightning in a skirt
that lifted with the wind, and it was there that i was willingly
just giving y o u   a     w      a        y. it was there that i held
    your head to my collarbone and imagined the beer on your
lips and the darkness in your eyes that hadn't been there
before.

i called you puppy and the word bounced off my lips
     like a deadly electric snap, like i was trying to revive you,
  clear, clear. i pressed my knees to a blanket and
could feel the skeletons of the grass grounding me and
keeping me aware of the fact that at any moment we could
    die or worse, be assaulted and stripped of every security
  we think we have.

your car is black like the night like your eyes like the darkness
   at the back of your throat that i see every time you bare
  your teeth to mouth i know, fixated on the sky
because you wonder if you just keep looking perhaps jesus
      will appear to tell you that you're not worthless. because
  you know that's all you need.

i'll cover your eyes and whisper, with how the world is
  today, every single fucking one of us is jesus christ. we all
have a religion to surround ourselves in which we worship
our toes and hair follicles. your worth is measured by how
    much you pray.


i'll enfold myself in the warm corner of your neck, saying, i
    just want you to be happy. i just want you to be happy
,
  until i melt and dilute and my pigment becomes yours and
our skin cells make love.
for a friend. you worry me.

"oh god, i hear you breathe over me. i tell the demons to leave and they politely tip their hats and exit in a reasonable manner."
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:iconmessageslieinsand:
MessagesLieInSand Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
You did a phenomenal job describing this moment. I know how rough and raw it is. Great stuff.

"fixated on the sky
because you wonder if you just keep looking perhaps jesus
will appear to tell you that you're not worthless. because
you know that's all you need."
Reply
:iconinjuredjaw:
injuredjaw Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2012
thank you very much. :heart:
Reply
:iconthepaperprince:
thepaperprince Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
I have never experienced this. Yet your way with words blew into me so strongly that it made me relate to the situation and feelings.

i'll cover your eyes and whisper, with how the world is
today, every single fucking one of us is jesus christ. we all
have a religion to surround ourselves in which we worship
our toes and hair follicles. your worth is measured by how
much you pray.


Energy. I am at a loss for what to say, except

beautiful. Fifty times over.
Reply
:iconinjuredjaw:
injuredjaw Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2010
thank you, fifty times over. ;] :heart:
Reply
:iconprojectilewordvomit:
projectilewordvomit Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
Love the ending most of all. :heart:
Reply
:iconinjuredjaw:
injuredjaw Featured By Owner Aug 11, 2009
thank you.
Reply
:iconnikkayyy:
nikkayyy Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009
"i'll cover your eyes and whisper, 'with how the world is today, every single fucking one of us is jesus christ. we all have a religion to surround ourselves in which we worship our toes and hair follicles. your worth is measured by how much you pray.'"

i love you.
Reply
:iconinjuredjaw:
injuredjaw Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009
:heart:!
Reply
:iconejectionletter:
ejectionletter Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
the ending gets me.
<3
Reply
:iconsakuranmitsuki:
SakuraNMitsuki Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
*Sighs* beautiful... and very true...
Reply
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